Last Days as an Arkansan

I’m winding down my days in the Natural State. By the end of the week, I’ll be heading west to our new home in OKC. While I can’t wait to step foot on Sooner (or shall we say Cowboy) soil, believe it or not, I am going to miss a few highlights of living in Arkansas. I’ll miss the beautiful scenery, friends who made living far from home somewhat bearable, horse racing, The Pancake Shop and running around the promenade (minus the part where the junior high boys join me). However, Mark and I will never reminisce about the curvy highways, crazy Southern accents, fanatic razorback fans, neighborhood crime and confusing tax laws. Each year, I write a Top Ten to culminate our anniversary. Following are the Top Ten Reasons Why We Must Escape the Natural State…
10. Wal-Mart is sure to run out of Dramamine soon.
9. Everything is plural in Arkansas. Example: “I says, we gots to go to MACDonalds to eats.”
8. Fort Smith is a heck of a long ways to drive to buy decent ice cream.
7. People think we’re cousins just because we’re married.
6. First the beast. Then masked men carrying AK-47’s. What’s next?
5. This Cowboy is suffocating in this razorback-obsessed world. (Is there another school in Arkansas? Didn’t think so!)
4. Two canoes + One not-so-strategically-placed electrical wire = One BIG Oops! (Think the hippy dude will ever find us?)
3. When the right wingers find out we voted for the other guy, we might be exiled anyway.
2. Four words: “You gotta get assessed.” Enough said.
1. God’s Country is calling us home!